


(No Good Witty Title) For the Death of Dreams

by shmorgas



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Accidental usage of the girl in the way of true love troupe, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Body Swap, F/F, F/M, Kid!Fic, M/M, Mates, Minor Character Death, Multi, WIP, never will be finished ever, please skip chapter 2 if that upsets you, sobs over never finishing any of this most likely, soul bonding, where all of my dreams die
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-21
Updated: 2014-04-20
Packaged: 2018-01-20 05:25:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1498294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shmorgas/pseuds/shmorgas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Here are a lot my WIPs that I feel that I may never finish.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Omega!Derek Alpha!Kate Alpha!Stiles

**Author's Note:**

> I would love to finish all of these but I most likely can't. Feel free to comment and message me at [this place](http://starmorgs.tumblr.com) if you want to cry about it or feel like you can finish these things.

“Why is Theodoric's middle name Luke?” Derek asks worryingly as he stares at his newborn son’s birth certificate. It’s July 28th. He’s home after three days in the hospital and is absolutely overwhelmed by the fact that he is a mateless sixteen year old Omega with an Alpha child. Derek is fucked over and everyone in his family knows it. But considering the circumstances that lead to this birth, plus the upcoming trial with the Argents, they are willing to accept Derek into their lives.

“You mentioned something about Star Wars,” Laura answers as she feeds her nephew Derek vaguely remembers this but this was mostly blocked out with the fact that he was high off of drugs and he was hurting so badly. Male Omegas have difficult pregnancies on a good day with a loving Alpha.

Not so much for Derek.

Luke was such a stereotypical name. But Derek can blame Stiles for that one. He was the one who showed up with the movies when Derek couldn’t bother to move.

Stupid eleven year old Alpha kid.

x.x

The story goes like this: Derek was fifteen and the talk of Beacon Hills. He was the first Omega at the high school to compete in multiple sports and garner the respect of the posturing Alpha jocks. The Betas loved him too because Derek wasn’t your average Omega. He was just a competitive dude and that was all that matter. Besides, it was California. Blending traditional social norms was an average day at highschool.

Everything started to suck majorly when the lifeguard Kate Silvers started to pay attention to Derek.

She smelt like mate and forever. Little did anyone know Kate was actually Kate Argent, the Alpha sex offender that liked to prowl on Omegas who didn’t “know their place”. MO: seduce, kidnap, violent rape. Needless to say that the first heat Derek had after meeting her was traumatizing. So much that everything ended like what you see in a movie: the cops busting in and ripping the assailant off the helpless victim. The daze of being ushered to the hospital, being administered a rape kit, and going to the station to give a statement is just what makes Derek go through the process.

That’s when Derek meets the right person. 

He’s five years younger and looks like Bambi with large brown eyes and a super large hoodie. He has moles all over his face and just screams blending in. Derek cries then and there because everything is just so fucked up. The kid approaches Derek and hugs him because soul bonds are weird. They haven’t said anything to one another but they are hugging like someone’s life is dependent on them.

“I’m Stiles,” the kid says eventually.

“Derek,” he answers back quietly.

“You smell too sweet,” Stiles states.

“Just my fucking luck,” Derek whispers.

Smelling too sweet means that you are pregnant and it doesn’t surprise Derek at all. Kate was fucking him in heat. Instant pregnancy was basically the only thing that could come of it.

x.x

Kate is arrested and charges are filed. The Sheriff and Talia get together to try to decide what was going to happen between their sons. Soul bonding usually doesn’t occur until both participants are at least sixteen. Considering the recent events, Derek's rape and the death of Claudia Stilinski, they both agree that their sons found each other for the better. But again, they are both ten and fifteen...

“Stiles says that he just wants to be Derek’s friend,” Bob says tiredly.

“Derek just needs a friend,” Talia offers in return. 

And just like that, the relationship is approved by the parents.

Derek decides to keep the baby to spite Kate. Stiles is a hyperactive presence in their lives. He talks about his school work and the latest fifth grade drama, about the latest things that he and his friends have been doing. Derek listens and talks about the things he’s been doing at the high school. He’s still enrolled, albeit no sports and moved to the pregnancy wing so he’s cut off from his friends (who turn out not to be his friends), and is dealing with being the town gossip.

He’s absolutely miserable.

“I’m not some fucking freak show,” Derek growls.

“Everyone keeps asking me about how I feel about my mom dying. I don’t want to tell them,” Stiles snarls as well. Because most of their conversations lead to this: bitching about being a pity party.

They cry. They panic. They panic a lot. Stiles gets medication for his panic attacks but Derek, thanks to his bun in the oven, can’t. They snark at each other because soulmates or not, this was not the best time to meet one another.

They eventually get over themselves.

x.x

Stiles leans over Theo's crib and frowns at the baby’s wrinkly face. Theo is sleeping.

“He’s ugly, Dee,” he announces.

“Thanks so much Stiles, just what I wanted to hear,” Derek retorts sarcastically.

“Not my fault your baby is ugly. I thought he was suppose to take after you,” Stiles snottily states. Holy God is Derek going to kill him. He flips him off.

“That’s not nice! There’s an innocent babe in the room!” Stiles faux-protests.

“Theo is barely a week old. He can’t see anything other than blurs,” Derek snorts. But then the kid starts crying and it sounds like he’s demanding for milk. Derek sighs and gets ready to breastfeed.

“EW! Don’t do that with me in the room you buttface!” Stiles squeals, running out with great speed.

Derek laughs and closes the door.

x.x

“So why do you hang out with Derek?” Lydia asks one day because she needs to know everything about everyone.

“I just do,” Stiles answers because his thing with Derek is complicated. It’s like t’hy’la but without the lover part because EW. One day but sure as hell not today!

Lydia just frowns and stomps off. Stiles still thinks that she’s gorgeous with her long strawberry-blonde hair whipping around her shoulder and the scent of Burberry floating off her clothes.

x.x

Theo can’t stop crying and Derek is just done. It’s his first day of his junior year and he wants to go. He’s rocking Theo back and forth, humming a song to try to get his two month old to sleep. Theo is more or less the carbon copy of Derek as a baby. He’s all chubby cheeks and fat limbs. His eyes are still baby blue.

“Come on baby, Daddy needs to go,” he mutters.

Theo wails in response.

“Alpha children do feel possessive of their Omega parents,” Peter says over his cup of coffee. Talia glares at him because as much as she loves her brother, he’s being an asshole right now.

Derek eventually manages to get Theo to go back to sleep as he’s singing Adele and almost misses the bus. He runs so fast and manages to get there as it was about to close its doors. Everyone stares at him as he walks to seat because again, he is A Thing to Oogle. He sits down in the back and gives everyone his best bitch face.

“What are you looking at?”

It’s not the first thing time it happens. It repeats during homeroom, during class, during lunch. Everywhere Derek goes, he gets stared at. Now let’s add this to Derek’s isolation, hormones, and the desire to be with his son, full stop. By the time his study rolls around he’s about to burst into tears. He’s no longer that amazing Omega athlete who broke all the rules. He’s just another Omega that got into a bad place.

It pisses him off so much to hear that.

Derek is a goddamn person. He has feelings, hopes, and dreams. But everything changed when some fucking predator decided that he was going to be her next victim. It wasn’t fair because none of it was his fault, thank you Stiles for getting that drilled in his brain. He’s never going to be truly liked anymore in this small town and Theo is going to get harassed for having one parent and an Omega at that.

He can’t win.

x.x

That revelation causes a change in Derek. No longer was he panicking or caring about the people in his school. A dark cloud settled over the young man. He was broody and rarely, truly smiled unless he was around Theo. Derek was being eaten from the inside out.

Stiles couldn’t do anything about it. He’s only eleven and doesn’t have an all-encompassing hatred. He understands that Derek has been violated against his will and that of Stiles ever crosses Kate Argent he'll send her to hell faster than a speeding bullet. But Stiles doesn't yet have the instinct to throw everyone away from his Omega. He hasn't hit puberty and four years is a fucking huge age gap for two young men.

Derek becomes moodier and moodier until one day he snaps. 

He sends an Alpha to the hospital. Granted, the kid has been a constant bully but violent retribution is never the answer. Derek got suspended and even when he was being reamed, the faraway look in his eyes meant that it wasn’t reaching. The lecture was cut short when Theo wailed and Derek had to go to take care of him.

Talia cursed Kate Argent to hell, the little cunt.

“You should sign him up for boxing classes or something,” Stiles remarks in the kitchen. He heard about the suspension and biked himself up to the house. Of course, Derek slammed the door in his face after the first joke. Talia got the boy into the kitchen to force feed him because she can’t stand the sight of a wounded kid.

“Why’s that?” Talia asks in response.

“He needs to know how to open a can of whoop-ass,” Stiles answers.

“And what about you Stiles?” Talia asks. He shrugs.

“I think he wants to protect himself.”

Sometimes Talia gets taken aback about the nature of the soul.

x.x

There are many theories on how the mating process works. Talia likes to think that bonding pairs of all types are just simply two halves of the same soul in two bodies. 

x.x

Stiles eventually gets Derek to talk to him. How you may wonder? Well…

“STILES, I SWEAR TO GOD, GIVE ME BACK THEO,” Derek howls because Stiles treed himself with Theo in a tightly bound sling.

“Nope,” Stiles answers.

“YOU FUCKING BASTARD, GIMME MY SON!” Derek screeches, trying to climb up the tree. Only, the tree is pretty slim and it looks like Stiles is swaying on the branch.

“You’re using this poor defenseless baby as your shield to the outside world. I’m actually freeing him!” Stiles retorts, rubbing his face on Theo’s appropriate chubby cheeks.


	2. The one where Laura is selfish and it really backfires

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sweet God, this hurt a bit. Please read the notes and heed the tag warnings.

On no particular day, during the 37th year of the existence of Stiles Stilinski, he is playing with his wedding band. He has been with his wife, Laura, for twenty-one years and they have three beautiful children. Honestly, it’s everything that Stiles has wanted since he was sixteen. But recently, things have been off. Like, he fights with Laura and it’s nasty all of a sudden. It gets so bad that Stiles needs to leave for the weekend and it’s freaking the kids out.  
It freaks Stiles out. He loves his family but it’s just not working out.  
Laura has just been impossible.  
As Stiles twists the ring, it slips off because he had been eating curly fries and there’s just so much grease. He sucks in a breath because he never takes his ring off. He picks it up, rubbing the grease off when he feels it. It’s a rune and Stiles’s heart drops into his feet. He has spent most of his life being the magic user for a pack of wolves and he knows the symbol intimately. He’s had to break a few bonds like these when the Hales had to face down rival packs made like a militia. A mockery of what pack really means.  
It makes you kept.  
His blood runs cold because if his ring has this rune, that means that his whole marriage has been a sham.   
Stiles runs.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXX  
Talia is not the Alpha she used to be but she hears and feels Stiles’s distress as he comes barreling into her office. He looks crazy, a look long passed into memory when she first met him at sixteen. No, he looks panicked and that makes the matriarch stand to attention. Her son-in-law does not panic. Not even when his youngest decided to be born in the middle of a pack war.  
“Stiles, honey, what’s wrong?” she asks because this is terrifying her. He simply shoves his ring towards her and she examines it. Talia feels the rune and her heart shatters because she just lost a beloved child.  
“Oh no...”  
“I’m melting it down and getting a goddamn divorce. I’m taking the kids and going away. You deal with Laura,” Stiles announces because this betrayal calls for swift retribution.   
“Wouldn’t you want to stay for the tribunal? To hear the reasons why?” Talia asks carefully.  
“It doesn’t matter. This is done. I’m out,” he states with a snarl.  
“You have the Alpha’s blessing. But please, tell me where you are when you get there,” she requests. It’s not an order between packmates, it’s a request between family. Talia is old and her time is limited. She wishes to not be separated from her grandchildren.  
“Fine.”  
The next morning has the Pack howling and snarling in confusion. Why is the Alpha Heir locked like a dog? Where is Stiles? Where’s Kessie? Bambam? Leeloo? Why has everything changed?  
Only Derek, Talia’s precious boy, does not say a word. He looks sad but the relief is clearer than anything in the world.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXX  
Everything begins on a hot summer’s day. Derek is eleven years old and cares more about climbing trees and poking things with his claws, gently. He's up in the trees one day when he spies on a teenager with a buzzcut and wearing too many layers for July. He smells like everything Derek has ever thought smelt good and then some.   
Mate.  
This moment was ruined by the fact that Laura, aged sixteen and a bit of bossypants, came rushing in smelling like attraction and nervous energy. The boy smiles widely and kisses her with all the grossness that comes with being a teenager.  
Goddamn Derek’s luck.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXX  
Stiles Stilinski is introduced to the Hales that night and Derek tries not to pine. He tries to act cool and not freak out because, hello, he just met his mate and turns out to be Laura’s boyfriend. Things can change. Nothing bad could happen.  
Except over mashed potatoes, Laura gives the last dollop to Stiles. And Derek knows that he can’t win against this. Because Laura never gives anything food related to anyone. EVER.  
Derek throws up a bit and claims it on food poisoning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of this occurred as a what if and there's a lot of politics involved on why Derek stopped chasing his "mate" and why he let Laura go in. Laura as much as the story was suppose to be against here wasn't going to be a complete bitch. There was reason and this was going to be a philosophical argument about free will and destiny.


	3. Mostly Notes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This had a buildup and some plot points. But ultimately abandoned. Sobs

Soulbonds in this world is supposingly exceedingly rare but Beacon Hills has a fuck ton of them. Hence the supernatural shenanigans and hence the soulbond.  
The way the soulbonds work is that everyone has a person or wolf that they just gel together really well with. Sometimes, if you’re closer to the supernatural, you have a better idea than others.  
The rule about no heterosexual pairings has to go with Alexander Argent and Ellen Emerys. Duke and Ellen were going to get married and Alexander was super duper obsessed with Ellen and yeah.  
So new rule!  
But it was kinda the norm anyway but this story was a real fucking kick in the pants.  
Hence the Argents are kinda ostracized in the community.  
Talia and Carrie Martin were total BFFs so when it turned out that they were both having girls, they agreed to try and soulbond their daughters.  
Claudia Stilinski and Melissa McCall become a part of the group when they all sign up for a bitch and knit session and friendship~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
When all the babies are born, Derek will only go near Stiles and Cora.  
Cora and Lydia, to their mothers’ dismay, “hate” each other.  
So when the first baby bonds are formed in about kindergarten during this festival like thing that can look kinda creepy from the outside, everyone kinda goes off with the other but scandals occur!  
Like their age group is called the generation of scandal  
IE the ever rare trio soul bond shows its face with a threeway connection between Scott, Isaac, and Allison.  
Julia and Kali, one of the lesbian soulmates, make a scene because Kali wants to soulbond with Ennis.  
Julia curses Kali.  
Hints to bad things on the horizon.  
BECAUSE SOMEONE CUT DOWN THE GODDAMN NEMETON.  
ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE.  
seriously, more shit goes down as a result.  
Eventually, the power of generation scandal defeats the bad guys and we have a happily ever after for everyone involved that deserved it.

Soulbonds  
Talia Hale/John Stilinski  
Peter Hale/Carrie Martin  
Claudia Stilinski/Deucalion Smith  
Laura Hale/Paige Baccari  
Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski  
Cora Hale/Lydia Martin  
Scott McCall/Allison Argent/Isaac Lahey  
Aiden Schwartz/Ethan Schwartz  
Danny Mahealani/Jackson Whittemore  
Erica Reyes/Vernon Boyd IV  
Kali Dasgupta/Julia Baccari  
Kali Dasgupta/Ennis McCoy

(The Story itself)  
When Stiles is twelve years old, his soulbond changes. Not that it means that it switches from Derek to some lameass other werewolf it just changes. It goes from steady and warm to hot. Just, when it hits Stiles for the very first time, he thinks he’s about to have a panic attack since he just can’t breathe and his skin is buzzing all over. Stiles wants Derek to just touch him because whenever Stiles is this crappy, this buzzed with his brain and feelings, all it takes is a simple touch for him to be grounded. Just like during the full moons Derek needs Stiles wrestle with him. 

It doesn’t get better with a touch.

The touch makes the buzzing more persistent and all Stiles wants is more, more, moremoremoremore, God Derek just fuck him already.

It’s the fantasy of Derek fucking him that causes Stiles to come back.

Because, oh God, it would just ruin everything.

Soulbonds, for the people of Beacon Hills, are a deep platonic relationship between human and werewolf so that the wolves remain as wolves and the humans don’t die. Once they could be formed freely between spouses, lovers, whatever word you want to use to indicate lover but that’s not the case any more.

Nobody talks about the death of Alexander Argent for a goddamn reason. Most soulbonds are same sex pairs for a fucking reason. Except if you’re badass and happen to be the Alpha and the Sheriff. Or if you were his Mom.

Porn bits (because I’m horny):  
Lydia/Cora

It’s a surprise weekend at home in the middle of a blizzard that gets Lydia and Cora into a shared room. While soulbonds are not explicitly encouraged to share spaces in situations like this, it was an unspoken rule. Even though things between them have been tenser than ever, on something that they don’t talk about, Lydia agrees to share a room with Cora.

It quickly devolves into an argument.

“I just want one more blanket. What exactly is wrong with that?” Cora asks with narrow eyes.

“Because one more blanket means buckets of sweat for me. I don’t have the necessary tools to look fabulous after a night sleep with a ‘wolf,” Lydia answers cooly.

“And I don’t have the patience for fucking queen bees but we both going to have to deal with some unpleasant shit,” Cora retorts. 

Lydia’s nostrils flare and Cora gets the old warm feeling from her lower belly at the sight. The general arousal around Lydia is something that Cora can easily ignore. She can handle it, handle being the platonic soulbond to the biggest fucking empress in the world, has been for years.

(insert snark and hissing about Jackson and how they’ve been circling around each other)

Lydia slams into Cora, kissing like she was claiming, like this was all her’s. Cora never backed down, never held back from Lydia. She pushed back harder, rougher, slamming her into the bed.


	4. Body Swap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I AM STILL MAD AT MYSELF FOR THIS ONE.

It happens in the middle of having sex with Jackson. One moment Lydia was getting the dumbass to finally go down on her when she found herself in front of the computer jacking off with a dick she apparently sprouted. The screaming leads to Sheriff Stilinski running up the stairs and breaking the goddamn door down.

“Stiles-JESUS CHRIST KID!” the Sheriff exclaims, turning his head away so fast that Lydia thinks she hears his neck crack.

“Um,” she manages to squeak out. Still turned around Stiles’s dad manages to get the following words out.

“I’m going on my shift. That gives you enough time to figure out the reason why you broke the number one rule about personal needs in this house,” he says. He then leaves and Lydia is alone with porn still playing in the corner of her eye, a limp dick, and the sudden realization that she is Stiles. She lunges at the phone on the desk and calls Jackson’s cell.

It rings once. Twice. Then Jackson answers with a snarl.

“Stilinski, now is not the fucking time-”

“Jackson, put me on the phone with Stiles,” Lydia commands brusquely. The line goes quiet and soon she hears her own voice.

“Lydia? Oh my God, how the fuck did this happen?”

Her worst fears have been confirmed.

“I have no clue. It certainly came at an inconvenient time...for everyone involved,” she answers. Lydia glances at the screen and goes to pause the porn. It’s of the gay variety and there’s a dark haired man with incredible muscles topping. She raises an eyebrow at this. 

“I didn’t need to know this about your sex life Lyds,” Stiles groans.

“Well, neither did I Stiles. Gay porn? Really?” Lydia snaps and she can hear Jackson let out a groan.

“Look, this sucks all around but I need you to come over. Because what the fuck,” Stiles says. She sighs and looks for the keys to the crappy piece of metal that Stiles called a car.

And some tissue because EW, Stiles’s preejectulate. 

“I’ll be there in ten.”

x.x

Stiles hangs up and gives Jackson back his phone. It’s weird to suddenly have boobs and hips and suddenly the center of his gravity shifted, how can anyone even walk??? He rolls off the bed and goes to find something of Lydia’s to put on. He looks for a bra and realizes that he is out of his league here. So he skips that part. He needs to completely ignore and forget about the way he came into the situation.

He’ll be avoiding looking at Jackson’s mouth for a good long while.

Unfortunately, Stiles can’t ignore Jackson right now because Lydia’s closet is on Jackson’s side of the bed and Stiles doesn’t feel like getting up and walking around. He can trip for the love of God! So he rolls over carefully Jackson’s problem, manages to get on his feet, and walks over to peruse the outfits.

“Oh my God Stilinski, stop moving,” Jackson hisses. Stiles looks over and glares.

“Sorry but Lydia decided that it would be for the best to wear underwear that shows her ass. What the actual fuck is appealing about a thong? It’s the absolute worst!” he retorts. He pulls a dress and then leans down to try to find shoes. Anything other than heels, please.

“Stop shaking your ass!” the asshole pleads.

“Again, not my goddamn fault! Does Lydia have any flats?” he asks.

“Hell if I know,” Jackson replies with a moan. Stiles whips his head back and sees that Jackson is jerking off.

“JESUS CHRIST DUDE! No, that is not okay! Go into the bathroom you fucking douche! I don’t need to see your dick!” he yells, covering his face. This has got to be more embarrassing than getting blown by Jackson in Lydia's body. It’s a testament to how bad it is that Jackson says nothing back as he waddles to the bathroom. 

“SO I’LL TELL YOU WHAT I WANT WHAT I REALLY REALLY WANT, SO TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT WHAT YOU REALLY REALLY WANT,” Stiles starts singing trying to drown out the moans. He didn’t want to know anything about the sex noises. Please, for the love of everything that is holy. That’s when Lydia comes bursting through the door like superhero. 

“Stiles, what the hell is going on here?!” she demands.

“I was just looking for some shoes when lo and behold, the lizard is jerking off behind me! I already know too much, I don’t need to know MORE!” Stiles snaps. Was that hysteria in his voice? Yes, yes it was.

“Why didn’t you put the dress on before searching for shoes?” she asks carefully like she was talking to a child. He flushes but doesn’t back down.

“Why don’t you have any flats?” he says in lieu of answers. He pulls the dress on and smooths it over.

“Decent choice,” Lydia judges and it’s so weird that even in a different body and with a different voice she still sounds like her. She ducks down and grabs a pair of heels.

“Lydia, please no. I suddenly have boobs, I can only handle so much change,” Stiles complains. He gets a glare for his troubles.

“You may be in my body-”

“Not the way I ever imagined, mind you.”

“-but you will be wearing what I usually wear. Body swap or not, I will look fabulous.”

Stiles can’t argue with that especially since Lydia went out of her way to wear his plaid. She absolutely detests plaid. He sighs and takes the shoes from her hands. This is the fucking Twilight Zone because all Stiles sees is his face and he can barely recognize it. Who knew that Lydia’s personality could change that much?

“Now I need you to put this on,” she instructs, handing over a tube of lipstick from her makeup bag. “Your eye makeup is still fine.” He takes the tube and walks over to the mirror. Thanks to his moonlighting as Alma Titties he manages to get it on practically perfect. Lydia looks shocked and Stiles just smiles brightly.

“Really?” Jackson asks as he emerges from the bathroom, problem taken care of. “Thanks for making everything more complicated Lydia.”

“Now Jackson, behave,” Lydia reprimands and oh God, that sounds like foreplay. Stiles suddenly realizes a big fucking problem with the body swap.

“Nope, no. Don’t do anything else. Please for the love of God, not with my body!” he shrieks.

“Stilinski,” Jackson grits out.

“I would prefer if we tried to figure out what was going on,” Stiles says. “That means that we need to tell Deaton and everyone else.”

And it’s with that logic that everyone begins to pile into the cars and send out a mass text to send people to Deaton.

x.x 

The trio arrive at the clinic and go through the back door. Nobody talks until Deaton comes back and he takes a look at them.

“Oh dear,” he says.

“Understatement of the year,” Stiles comments. Luckily, the rest of the wolves (minus Peter) comes in and business can be taken care of.

“I swapped bodies with Stiles,” Lydia announces.

“What?” everyone said with varying degrees of disbelief.

“Here’s the proof. Scott, when we were nine, we accidentally locked ourselves in your parents’ closet. We found a box with a pair of bright red boots that sure as hell weren’t your mother’s,” Stiles quickly says before anyone else can say more.

Everything is quiet and Scott has his intense face as he looks at Stiles, in Lydia’s body, up and down.

“Stiles?” he asks incredulously.

“Yep, right here Cujo,” Stiles says with a wide smile. Lydia rolled her eyes.

“What the actual fuck?” Cora and Isaac asked at the same time. Of course it caused the two to glare at each other. Werewolf flirting was weird.

“What did you do?” Derek asked tiredly.

“We did nothing Derek,” Lydia said icily. Derek ignored her.

“Unless you count the part about the both having swapped when we were in our respective sexy times,” Stiles adds.

“Goddamn it, keep your mouth shut!” Jackson yells. Everyone more or less blanches.

“Actually Mr. Whittemore, Mr. Stilinski was correct in revealing that detail. It could help in finding a solution,” Deaton says pointedly.

“So that means we have to enter into the research montage soon?” Scott asks.   
“Dibs on using your house. I think my dad will get suspicious if I show up as Lydia,” Stiles says.

“Oh shit,” Lydia curses. “I don’t want to see the Sheriff after he caught me in front of your porn Stiles.”

There’s a snicker from Erica and Stiles laughs.

“Oh I pity you! Expect hell Lyds!” Stiles says gleefully. The glare that Lydia sends his way is devastating and only the wolves manage to be cowed. It was one thing to see it on the Queen Bee; it was another to see it on the Comic Relief.

“Thank you Stiles. So much,” she hissed.

“I had to deal with seeing Jackson’s dick,” was the calm reply back.

“Oh dude, I did not need to hear that,” Scott moaned over the collective groans of the packs.

“Fuck you Stilinski,” Jackson snarls.

“You already did asshole.”

“As much as I want to hear about the blossoming sexual experiences of teenagers, I would like to actually find a solution to our problem,” Peter snarked.

“It won’t be long for me to locate the appropriate solution to this particular body swap. In the meantime, I would appreciate if you would all vacate the premises. I have kittens to deliver,” Deaton stated.

Once Scott started squealing and prepping for the c-section, everyone started to shuffle out. Stiles started to make his way to his baby when he remembered that he can’t go home and see his dad.

“SHIT.”

x.x

Lydia pulled up to the Stilinski house, turned the car off, and took in a deep breathe. She can do this. She can pretend to be Stiles’ manic version of intelligence and the Sheriff will never know for the better. If she becomes clumsy because she has to now handle eight more inches of height and a new gravity center, she can just blame it on Stiles’ clumsiness. A sense of bitterness rushes over Lydia as she thinks about the relationship between the Stilinski men.

Stiles never had to have someone use him as an upper hand for a familial battle.


End file.
